Can the Passage of Time Really Mend a Broken Heart?
Posted on 5th October 2021 at 17:20
Over the years, many grievers have shared with us that they have been told they can’t start working on recovering from their loss for at least the first six months.
The idea being that you will start to feel better after a while - because time is a great healer.
At Grief UK we know that time doesn't heal a broken heart brought about by a bereavement. While we may learn to adjust over time to life with the pain of the loss, the unresolved grief will continue to create emotional conflict, impact relationships and potentially cause destructive behaviour.
After loss, there’s an unspoken expectation among professionals that you would feel sad and experience the pain of loss for the first six months, and by only offering help after six months it goes to the people who are still emotionally stressed.
The World Health Organisation has identified ‘Prolonged Grief Disorder’ for people who are still suffering loss after six months of a significant other and encourages organisation to wait for that amount of time.
It’s Never Too Early to Start Healing
We say it’s never too early to start healing your broken heart. The process of working through unresolved grief is the same whenever you do it.
So, beware of well-intentioned platitudes such as "grief just takes time"' or being told to "give it time" - these only reinforce the myth that time heals all wounds.
Time doesn’t heal; it’s what we do within that time that heals. Nothing will change until reparative actions begin, and then, as the result of those actions taken within time, you will be able to feel more emotionally complete.
The Grief Recovery Method is a personalised action plan for moving beyond loss. But what do we mean by recovery?
Recovery is about becoming emotionally complete and beginning the next phase of your life with a fresh perspective.
The process of grief recovery lies in learning to deal with emotions that are so painful that they interfere with your ability to function at your best - and to help you discover and complete what was left emotionally unfinished with a person who is either still living or has passed away.
As you watch a loved one withdraw more and more as a result of a terminal illness, you’re likely to feel grief for their death by inches, even though they’re still living. Each appointment that brings another reminder of gradual decline can hit you like a tonne of bricks.
The Grief recovery programme can also help ahead of someone dying, for example your loved one has a terminal illness. The series of small and correct actions, along with the right information will help lead you to recovery.
You can download our Guide to Loss eBook. Including 61 tips on the experience of grief and how to help people through it.
Purchase your copy of the Grief Recovery Handbook - the action programme for moving beyond death, divorce and other losses.
Find your nearest Grief Recovery Specialist.
Tagged as: bereavement, is it possible to recover from grief, talking about loss, What is Grief Recovery?
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