How I can help you
I’m so glad you’re here taking action and seeking help to heal your grief.
Are you feeling stuck, unable to move forward in your life, heartbroken? Are you exhausted by the effort it takes to hide your feelings, barely managing to keep it all together?
Those are some of the feelings that brought me here too. My heart was broken when my husband and I lost our beautiful 14 year old son. One day he just disappeared, taken by an acquaintance to live with her family. Within days he’d cut off contact with our family and friends outside of their circle. Three and a half years later I was still stuck in an endless cycle of anguish, turmoil and victimhood and nothing I tried helped.
Then I found Grief UK, as I read every word on the website, I felt hope creeping in, someone had switched the light on in my tunnel. I jumped at the chance to do the Grief Recovery Method. During the course I gained insight into why I was stuck and then the tools to help me let go of the pain. People often say, “just let go…” but no one ever told me how, now I know how.
When I had completed the Grief Recovery Method on my son my husband said, “You’re different,” and I was! I felt like I had been set free. Working through this process has been life changing for me. It allowed me to not only heal the pain of losing my son but many other major losses too. I’m now on a mission to share the Grief Recovery Method with other grievers so they too can find that relief and peace.
If you would like to work with me I will guide you through the same process I've been through. We’ll take it step by step, we’ll do it together and I will go first and show you what to do. You will leave with a new “toolkit” that you can use for healing other losses you’ve had or will encounter in the future.
I live in Queensland, Australia and spend several months each year in Ballynahinch, Northern Ireland. I enjoy working online with clients from USA, South Africa, UK and Australia.
Please get in touch, we can arrange to meet each other on zoom and have a no obligation chat. I would love to be of service to you on your Grief Recovery journey.
Over 40+ life losses can leave us feeling bereft
When we think of bereavement, we usually think of the death of a loved one. Most people looking for bereavement counselling or a grief coach only feel entitled to do so if someone close to them has died.
However there are over 40 different personal losses that can leave us feeling devastated, heartbroken, lost, hopeless and ultimately cause the same emotional and physical symptoms of grief.
The Grief Recovery Method is unique in that it is applicable to any and all kinds of loss. Each Certified Grief Recovery Specialist has been trained to guide grievers without judgement, criticism or analysis. We do not compare losses and we know that every griever is unique.
Not only can the action steps within the Grief Recovery Method be applied to any type of loss, they can be used again and again with any future losses that occur - once you have participated in a Programme, you will have all the tools you need to cope with loss later in life.
Death of a loved one
Divorce, separation, breakup
Estrangement of family members
Abusive or absent parent
Loss of safety due to trauma
Death of a pet
Retirement, empty nest
Loss of health
Loss of finances
Loss of faith
Loss of career
Loss of identity
"I was very lucky to come into contact with Deirdre at a time when there were multiple losses and changes in my life.
"I lost my beloved beagle in February 2020 to cancer. I had him for 13 years and he was like my own child. The stresses of dealing with his cancer for 6 months prior to his passing also caused my own cancer to return. By March 2020, the need to tend to my own health and coupled with the Covid-19 lockdown, I decided to give up work after 38 years as a health professional and retire.
"Having done various healing modalities in the past, I thought I had the tools to help myself and that I was coping with these life changes pretty well. In effect I wasn’t. I was constantly tired and unmotivated, and whatever energy I had, I was spending it on the computer doing research as a means to distract myself. I was binge eating for comfort and also isolated myself from other people. On top of this, my relationship with my son went downhill because we hold very different views on current events. His intolerance and persistent vicious attacks shocked me. I went into deep grief because I felt I have lost my son and there’s little left of our relationship.
"I heard about The Grief Recovery Method from a friend and at first I was hesitant to do the program because I really thought I was ok. I thought “This too shall pass”. I believed in the myths of “grieving alone” and “just giving it time”. The reality was that I was actually in shock mode from all the accumulated losses in those few months. Sadly I didn’t even recognise some of them as losses. I didn’t know I was grieving for the loss of my career, health, relationship with my son, financial security and everyday life as I knew it, on top of grieving for the death of my dog.
"But after reading The Grief Recovery Handbook and talking to Deirdre about her own experience with the method, I knew I had to do it. The method allows me to view my life in absolutely honesty and without judgement. I could see how so many previous losses were never addressed and went underground. I could see how a “small insignificant” loss in the present can tip the balance because of the accumulated charge from the past.
"I worked on my relationship with my son as my first exercise because it was causing me the most upset. I was faithful to the entire process although there was a part of me that doubted if the simplicity of it would actually work. But having finished the program I am grateful to say I no longer live in the hurt and grief that was consuming me for so many months.
"I am able to look at our relationship with neutrality and a new-found peace. I am able to let go of the need to change my son or to make him wrong. I no longer need to dwell in the past and replay scenes that only serve to hurt me further. The biggest gift is the freedom I know I can have in spite of what happens to me in the external world. I’m confident that I can apply the method to the other losses in my life, including the less tangible ones.
"I whole-heartedly recommend Deirdre as your guide and specialist in your journey to recovery from grief. Deirdre is compassionate while being thorough and professional. I felt heard and understood at all times which is so important when the method requires absolutely honesty. I felt very safe with Deirdre. No matter how big or small your loss /grief, peace and freedom is achievable." Clare T - Sydney, Australia - 1:1 Online Participant
"Deirdre as a professional Grief Recovery Method Specialist held a beautiful space for us to share experiences and move through the program with her acting as my coach. I found the content full of new and useful information and Deirdre was easy to follow. There was plenty of effort on my part to follow along each week and do my "heartwork"; but she was understanding if I needed more time and rescheduling was accommodated. In doing this GRM I have found a new and useful tool for managing the inevitable ups and downs of life. " A.S. - New Jersey, USA - 1:1 Online Participant
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Have you participated in one of my programmes?
Helping Children with Loss
In addition to Grief Recovery Method programmes for grievers, I also offer courses for adults - parents, teachers and professionals - who would like to be better equipped to help the children in their care cope with losses of any kind.
The ACEs-informed Helping Children with Loss programme uses the same principles of the evidence-based Grief Recovery Method but adapts them for use with children of all ages and ability level.
Bereaved Mum Nicky Clifford recommends The Grief Recovery Method
From devastating bereavement to Grief Recovery - Jill Attree's story
A brief introduction to the Grief Recovery Method
Common Myths about the Loss of a Child
The loss of a child is truly devastating. But it does not have to mean that your life is over. Let's discuss some of the common myths around child loss and what they really mean.
First Mother’s Day without Mum
Last July, just as I’d pitched up a tent in a field in Cornwall, I got a devastating call from my mum’s friend to say that she’d started coughing up blood not long after we’d left home and had been taken by ambulance to hospital. She didn’t want to worry us. The next day, we learned she had terminal lung cancer that had spread.
When motherhood isn't as expected
Some of us may struggle with a mixture of complicated feelings on Mothering Sunday - even though we are supposed to "enjoy every minute" of motherhood, things are not always as we expected them to be.
Valentine’s When You’re Grieving
When you’ve experienced the death of your husband, wife, or partner, the lead-up to Valentine’s Day may cause you to want to hide undercover until it’s all over.
Reaching out for a partner who is no longer there
“If only I could tell them I love them one more time.” “If only I could touch them again.” “If only we could have one more day together.”
Did “emotional baggage” ruin your relationship?
When we finally learn how to unpack our emotional baggage, we open ourselves up to a multitude of new and exciting possibilities.
- Common Myths about the Loss of a Child Posted on 13th May 2021 at 12:16
- First Mother’s Day without Mum Posted on 9th March 2021 at 16:09
- When motherhood isn't as expected Posted on 2nd March 2021 at 14:07
- Esther Rantzen - Living with Grief Posted on 17th February 2021 at 11:27
- Valentine’s When You’re Grieving Posted on 12th February 2021 at 16:07
- Lucy Herd of "Jack's Law" Talks about being a Grief Recovery Specialist Posted on 2nd November 2020 at 16:40
- The Kiss of Death on a Friendship Posted on 26th October 2020 at 19:23
- Carrying the Pain of Baby Loss Posted on 15th October 2020 at 16:57
- Grieving the Living Posted on 22nd September 2020 at 19:18
- Reaching out for a partner who is no longer there Posted on 17th September 2020 at 14:06
Book your place
Grief Recovery 1-1 Online
This evidence-based, step-by-step course will help participants complete the actions necessary to recover from grief in seven 1-hour sessions that take place online with an Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist. It is a powerful, dynamic, sensible and accessible programme that is genuinely for anyone willing to take the necessary actions to help themselves.
The programme is task based with weekly homework assignments using the Grief Recovery Handbook as the reference book.