How I can help you
In December 2018, my 7 month old twin baby boy died suddenly. My heart broke and I was totally devastated. I got lots of “encouraging" words from people which made sense intellectually but my heart was still bleeding. I quickly learnt how to put on a brave face but inwards I was in severe pain and felt isolated in my pain.
Until I found The Grief Recovery Method (GRM). GRM transformed my life and has helped me see beyond my pain. It has given me the tools to let go of my pain, grief well, find new meaning of life and true purpose in this adversity.
I want to help show you through this action programme how to move beyond death, divorce and any other major emotional loss. With GRM you’ll go through a step-by-step process and you will get tools that will help you recover and which you can use for future losses as well.
My desire is to walk alongside you (especially mothers who have lost a child born or unborn) to let go of the pain and find new purpose in life. I can walk with you online, in person or in a group setting.
If you have experienced heartbreak as a result of death, divorce, loss of a job or any other emotional loss and you desire to move forward, let go of the pain and live fully, book your complimentary call now by clicking this link to find out if the method is for you.
My life's purpose is to activate others especially women into a life of significance no matter what trauma you may have gone through in life. You can learn more about the other coaching services and programs I provide at www.detolaamure.com.
Over 40+ life losses can leave us feeling bereft
When we think of bereavement, we usually think of the death of a loved one. Most people looking for bereavement counselling or a grief coach only feel entitled to do so if someone close to them has died.
However there are over 40 different personal losses that can leave us feeling devastated, heartbroken, lost, hopeless and ultimately cause the same emotional and physical symptoms of grief.
The Grief Recovery Method is unique in that it is applicable to any and all kinds of loss. Each Certified Grief Recovery Specialist has been trained to guide grievers without judgement, criticism or analysis. We do not compare losses and we know that every griever is unique.
Not only can the action steps within the Grief Recovery Method be applied to any type of loss, they can be used again and again with any future losses that occur - once you have participated in a Programme, you will have all the tools you need to cope with loss later in life.
Death of a loved one
Divorce, separation, breakup
Estrangement of family members
Abusive or absent parent
Loss of safety due to trauma
Death of a pet
Retirement, empty nest
Loss of health
Loss of finances
Loss of faith
Loss of career
Loss of identity
"I came across grief work by what I will call a mistake. Prior to that, my assumption was that grieving was only connected to the death of someone. I met Detola at a point in my life that I was angry, depressed and heart broken. Through the grief work I did with her, I became a brand new person. She is warm, caring, loving, compassionate, patient, kind, and well versed in what she does. She listened, supported, enlightened and educated me about my emotions and what I was feeling.
"In addition to the numerous things I learned, I understood for the very first time what forgiveness meant and how important it was for me to forgive to live a fulfilled life. Detola held my hands during one of the most difficult period of my life and because of her and her teachings, I can smile again. I am thrilled about what the future holds. Now I have the necessary tools to navigate through relationships and situations in life. Thank you Detola!"
- Benny Williams, 1:1 online participant.
"I contacted Grief Recovery UK after watching a webinar of How to recognise grief in your coaching clients and thought they may be able to help me. I had four recurrent miscarriages in 2013/2014 and even though I’d had a couple of NHS counselling sessions at the time the thoughts were still going round and round in my head today. I was also angry that family and society had forgotten about my babies and I didn’t know who to talk to and how to process my feelings.
"I was put in touch with Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist Detola Amure whom had experienced child loss as I needed to talk to someone who understood similar feelings around this. I’ve completed the seven week course and it has been nothing short of amazing. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Detola has been so kind and compassionate and helped me to recover all memories of my baby loss grief.
"She listened with empathy and took me through the steps to complete my grief. I even talked about other areas of my life/relationships that were unresolved and I got to complete those too. Even though my time with Detola is now over she has given me the steps to carry on with the program on my own with Confidence. I also know that I can book a session with her at any point as well.
"I wholeheartedly recommend the Grief Recovery Method to anyone with unresolved grief and I graciously thank Detola from the bottom of my heart for listening and helping me. I now feel heard and complete."
-Joanne McDermott, 1:1 online participant.
"The Grief recovery method and Coach Detola’s approach have helped me understand grief and work through historical loss in a constructive way that has transformed my life.
"This approach has given me practical tools to help me move beyond historical trauma and loss in a safe environment where I had struggled for many years to do so. I now have lifelong tools that will enable me to work through cycles of grief in a safe way.
"Detola Amure is a consummate professional who walked me step by step through this process. I’ve experienced such transformation and have a countered completion through this amazing programme. Thank you Detola. My life and that of my family has been transformed."
~Lashelle M., 1:1 online participant.
"I lost my Dad last year and a friend of mine referred me to Detola as he thought that her experience would be beneficial to me. I was not aware that such a program existed. It was new to me and I started to do my research. I decided that I would give it a chance as I was keen to find ways to "heal" from my lovely Dad’s loss. Our relationship was so special and inside me I knew that he would have love me do whatever it takes to live my best life.
"In April 2020, I had my first session with Detola and we embarked onto the grief recovery journey. I remember telling Detola that I was not convinced by what we intended to achieve but she was a good listener and she held my hand quietly to bring me into a safe place. I committed myself to the process and followed through with the exercises. I realised that beyond the pain of losing someone close to your heart, grieving is a discovery of oneself.
"I am now grateful for the time spent with Detola and the work that we did comforted me and will continue to do so. I will definitely recommend the Grief Recovery method to anyone experiencing loss."
- Nathalie M., 1:1 online participant.
"Prior to taking the Grief Recovery Program with Detola, I didn’t necessarily think I was “grieving” though I knew I was in a complicated state of mind that needed some type of help. In the past I found counselling to not necessarily address my deepest struggles or be helpful long run. I knew I needed to do 'some work' to progress effectively in life.
"There were many takeaways and aha moments during the program. I got to spend quality time alone to think through my pain and confront difficult feelings. Some of my habits were put in proper perspective. Hidden hurts around my dad’s death that I was not even thinking about resurfaced.
"Overall, I feel a strong sense of peace knowing that I have confronted major aspects of my pain. That I have been intentional and have put in the HARD WORK and investment in my healing process. Detola was VERY patient and non-judgmental. I felt AT HOME sharing my deepest pain. When the journey became hard & I wanted to bail, she stood LOVING but firm to ensure I finished. This set me on a great foundation as my healing progresses."
- Josephine, 1:1 online participant.
"I made the decision to invest in myself and enrol on the 1-1 GR online programme after hearing Detola speak about grief and the myths that surround our understanding of grief. I quickly learned that some attitudes and behaviour I exhibit are directly because of past grief events I hadn't dealt with and completed. I am now on a journey to being a whole and healed individual, thank you." - Esther, 1:1 online participant.
"I was part of Detola's pilot group, a 4 weeks programme on helping children with loss. I highly recommend this programme for parents and those working with children as it will equip you to know how to respond and support the children in your care deal with loss.
"The part that stood out for me is the Emotional Energy Checklist - this is a guide/tool that helps parents, teachers, and caregivers discover how children might be feeling when they experience change and loss. It teaches you how to communicate, listen, and help children deal with their emotional pain.
"Detola delivered the programme excellently well and clarified all questions asked. I enjoyed all the sessions and cannot recommend it enough. Thanks, Detola for the opportunity to be part of your pilot group."
- Bisi, Helping Children with Loss Programme participant.
"The pilot run of the "Helping Children With Loss Programme" organised/hosted and facilitated by Coach Detola Amure was indeed an awesome experience. It was an eye-opener. I was able to understand that grieving is not only about the loss of life but loss of anything that is dear to you or you cherish so much. I was able to understand a bit on how to help children go through the process of grief recovery. Coach Detola is good at what she does. She facilitated this program with ease and great understanding. I will recommend that anyone who wants to go through this program should do so with Coach Detola."
- Zinny, Helping Children with Loss Programme participant.
"I was truly honoured to have been a part of the Pilot programme for "Helping Children with loss”. I signed up not exactly knowing what to expect. But at the end of the programme, I came out with a truck load of information to work with.
"Detola, took her time to explain every session in bits and details. I came out unlearning old habits and picked new and very good information as per helping children cope with loss, and also effective communication with my own kids as well. I recommend this programme for every parent, every minister, every children teacher, every teacher, every one who works directly with children in one capacity or another. You will thank me for signing up. Thank you Detola you are amazing."
- Ifeoluwa, Helping Children with Loss Programme participant.
Your feedback helps Grief UK provide high-quality programmes to grievers all over the world. Please help us out by leaving me feedback - it only takes a few minutes.
Have you participated in one of my programmes?
Helping Children with Loss
In addition to Grief Recovery Method programmes for grievers, I also offer courses for adults - parents, teachers and professionals - who would like to be better equipped to help the children in their care cope with losses of any kind.
The ACEs-informed Helping Children with Loss programme uses the same principles of the evidence-based Grief Recovery Method but adapts them for use with children of all ages and ability level.
Bereaved Mum Nicky Clifford recommends The Grief Recovery Method
From devastating bereavement to Grief Recovery - Jill Attree's story
A brief introduction to the Grief Recovery Method
Help for survivors of bereavement by suicide
If you've suffered a loss by suicide or are looking for bereavement counselling for suicide, we're here to offer support.
First Mother’s Day without Mum
Last July, just as I’d pitched up a tent in a field in Cornwall, I got a devastating call from my mum’s friend to say that she’d started coughing up blood not long after we’d left home and had been taken by ambulance to hospital. She didn’t want to worry us. The next day, we learned she had terminal lung cancer that had spread.
Esther Rantzen - Living with Grief
It's not very often tv talks about grief so we're thrilled that Channel 5 have given Esther Rantzen the chance to explore the topic in this ground breaking documentary. A widow herself, Esther wanted to understand other people's reactions to loss and in the in-depth programme she talks to 6 people about their grief experience.
Learning to Let Go of Emotional Baggage
When people say, ‘You have to let go and move on,’ at the end of a relationship, but not many people give you the steps to teach you how to let go of emotional baggage.
Valentine’s When You’re Grieving
When you’ve experienced the death of your husband, wife, or partner, the lead-up to Valentine’s Day may cause you to want to hide undercover until it’s all over.
Eating, Drinking, Keeping Busy: How we're coping with a second lockdown
Have you been hiding or burying your feelings under food or alcohol? Or are shopping and TV your coping mechanism of choice? Here are some things to do instead.
- Learning to Let Go of Emotional Baggage Posted on 26th July 2021 at 16:04
- Help for survivors of bereavement by suicide Posted on 31st March 2021 at 14:53
- First Mother’s Day without Mum Posted on 9th March 2021 at 16:09
- Esther Rantzen - Living with Grief Posted on 17th February 2021 at 11:27
- Valentine’s When You’re Grieving Posted on 12th February 2021 at 16:07
- Eating, Drinking, Keeping Busy: How we're coping with a second lockdown Posted on 25th January 2021 at 12:25
- Stuck on a painful lasting image? Posted on 8th December 2020 at 15:14
- Top 8 Tips for Surviving Grief at Christmas Posted on 2nd December 2020 at 13:25
- Men, Grief and Sudden Loss Posted on 27th November 2020 at 14:06
- Not Able to Say Goodbye? 2020, a Year of Loss Posted on 19th November 2020 at 12:15
Book your place
Grief Recovery Group Programme
Experience the power of Grief Recovery in a group setting. 8 two-hour sessions with a maximum of 12 people. The programme is task based with weekly homework assignments using the Grief Recovery Handbook as the reference book.
For more information on dates/locations, etc. please click the button below.
Grief Recovery 1 to 1 Programme
This step-by-step course shows individuals how to complete the actions necessary to recover from grief in seven 1-hour sessions. Taking place in a safe environment with a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist, it provides a genuine alternative to counselling or therapy. It is a powerful, dynamic, sensible and accessible programme that is genuinely for anyone willing to take the necessary actions to help themselves.
The programme is task based with weekly homework assignments using the Grief Recovery Handbook as the reference book.
Grief Recovery Helping Children with Loss
The Helping Children with Loss programme is for parents, teachers and anyone who works with children in a professional environment. It provides adults with the same tools and techniques used in the evidence based Grief Recovery Method, so they can assist children and young adults of any age or ability level through a loss.
Grief Recovery Pet Loss Programme
The loss of a pet can be emotionally devastating. Sadly, the impact of the heartbreak of this type of loss is often downplayed or ignored by friends and family. This 6-meeting program is focused on offering pet owners an effective mechanism for taking action to move through and beyond their grief.
Grief Recovery 1-1 Online
This evidence-based, step-by-step course will help participants complete the actions necessary to recover from grief in seven 1-hour sessions that take place online with an Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist. It is a powerful, dynamic, sensible and accessible programme that is genuinely for anyone willing to take the necessary actions to help themselves.
The programme is task based with weekly homework assignments using the Grief Recovery Handbook as the reference book.
Grief Recovery Helping Children with Loss Online
The Helping Children with Loss programme is an online course for parents, teachers and anyone who works with children in a professional environment. It provides adults with the same tools and techniques used in the evidence based Grief Recovery Method, so they can assist children and young adults of any age or ability level through a loss.