How I can help you
Hello and welcome to my website. I am Jill and I live on the South Coast in Poole, Dorset. In 2013 I suffered the most devastating loss. My sister died suddenly, with no warning. I was left with an overwhelming feeling of loss and a sadness in my heart like I had never felt before. I just switched to automatic pilot, desperately trying to hold things together and be strong for others whilst grieving myself. I felt completely overwhelmed, I was exhausted from constantly 'wearing my mask'. I needed help.
I contacted Carole at Grief Recovery UK and for the first time I felt listened to, that I actually mattered. Everything suddenly made sense, I wasn't going mad, I was grieving. My lightbulb moment was actually realising my grief wasn't just for my sister. My pain and heartache was for a significant emotional loss caused by a life event that I had ignored.
So my life changing journey began and I qualified as a Grief Recovery Specialist in 2018. My passion to support others grew stronger and in 2019 I qualified as an Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist. In 2020 I was honoured to be awarded Grief Recovery Specialist of the year - an incredibly proud moment in my life. I have the ability to reach out to others, to help them complete on their losses, to find peace and move forward. I will listen to you as you share your story, without judgement, analysis or criticism. I will allow you to feel safe so that you can move forward through your grief.
Over 40+ life losses can leave us feeling bereft
When we think of bereavement, we usually think of the death of a loved one. Most people looking for bereavement counselling or a grief coach only feel entitled to do so if someone close to them has died.
However there are over 40 different personal losses that can leave us feeling devastated, heartbroken, lost, hopeless and ultimately cause the same emotional and physical symptoms of grief.
The Grief Recovery Method is unique in that it is applicable to any and all kinds of loss. Each Certified Grief Recovery Specialist has been trained to guide grievers without judgement, criticism or analysis. We do not compare losses and we know that every griever is unique.
Not only can the action steps within the Grief Recovery Method be applied to any type of loss, they can be used again and again with any future losses that occur - once you have participated in a Programme, you will have all the tools you need to cope with loss later in life.
Death of a loved one
Divorce, separation, breakup
Estrangement of family members
Abusive or absent parent
Loss of safety due to trauma
Death of a pet
Retirement, empty nest
Loss of health
Loss of finances
Loss of faith
Loss of career
Loss of identity
"Today marks the last session of my Grief Recovery with Jill and I don't even know if I can begin to put into words how much this has helped me.
"I have had a few sessions of counselling in the past and yes it was great to talk to someone, but I never really felt that it helped me deal with the pain of losing someone I loved so much. Anniversaries would come and go and my shattered hopes, dreams and expectations would still fill me with sadness and there was a big part of me that felt that I couldn’t 'bring it up' again when I wanted to talk about my Mum.
"Jill has given me such an understanding about grief and about myself. There was me thinking it was just about death but it’s really not! It’s so much more!
"You have to experience it to truly feel the effects, but the only way I can describe how I feel today is….FREE! I am free of pain that was holding me back from truly enjoying every minute of the life I have been given. For the first time in 4 years, today, I thought about my Mum with not a single ounce of sadness but instead an overwhelming sense of happiness!
"So many people have said to me that they wish they could afford to do this and I say, it literally is, without a shadow of a doubt, the best money I have ever spent! Thank you Jill for helping to free me and giving me lifelong skills to deal with any type of loss that life might throw at me!"
- Sam, 1-1 participant
"Jill is INCREDIBLE! She is calm, unconditionally loving, supportive, non-judgemental and a true expert in the field of grief and overcoming grief in a holistic, healthy and sustainable way. I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend her to anyone wanting to overcome grief of any kind. She’s highly experienced, effective and empathetic. If you’re thinking about reaching out to her, do it!!"
- S, 1-1 online participant
"I have just completed the grief recovery method 1:1 with Jill and I cannot recommend it more. My dad died in the summer and this prompted me to seek help. When I first spoke to Jill on the phone I knew she was the person for me. She is warm, friendly and kind. She listened to me and I really felt like she heard what I was saying. We shared and talked about many things and I soon learnt how other losses have impacted my life. Through Jill’s wise guidance I feel like a different person today than I did only a few weeks ago. I have opened up in ways I never have before and now I feel lighter, happier and more hopeful about the future. This is a powerful programme and really can transform your life. I cannot thank Jill enough for what she has given me. It truly is a wonderful gift."
- Katy, 1-1 online participant
"I have completed on a 7 week grief recovery with Jill. She is an amazing, caring and non judgemental lady, I felt completely safe with my well being when in her care and felt I could open up where I haven’t been able to for so long. Jill has helped me move on with my life and I can’t thank her enough for what she has done for me. Thank you Jill."
- CH, 1-1 online participant
"If you are struggling with the aftermath of a loss, Jill can really help you. I can honestly say that going through the Grief Recovery Course is the best thing I have done to try and get back on track after losing my beautiful mum. The Grief Recovery course is unlike counselling where you just talk through things, it gives you steps to actually recover, have peace and move on. Jill's warm and encouraging nature makes it a safe and comfortable process and I can honestly say I feel so much better for meeting with her!"
- Rose, 1-1 online participant
"Today, I competed the Grief Recovery Course with the lovely Jill Attree. This course helps you to recover from a loss step by step. I found out lots about grief and loss that I didn't know before. It's surprising how many myths there are around grief and loss that we are taught during our childhood.
"I couldn't have asked for anyone better to go through the course with me. Jill is such a kind-hearted, caring lady who I felt 100% comfortable and safe with the entire time. Jill has helped me through what has been the hardest time of my life and I can't sing her praises enough. If you're dealing with a loss - reach out to Jill."
- Becca, 1-1 online participant
"Jill helped me through a really rough time, I’m so glad that I sought help from her as I would not have survived what was to come, all I can say quite simply is thank you!"
- David, 1-1 online participant
"To dear wonderful Jill, I’ve learnt so much from you over the past 7 weeks with the Grief Recovery, a massive thank you from the bottom of my heart ...This recovery has been structured, unlike counselling where you bear your soul for someone to set boundaries, this has made me dig deeper to emotional issues which in turn has brought up some very mixed feelings. I feel extremely positive and free now I’ve completed the course. I wish you all the best of luck Jill and would recommend anyone going through any kind of loss to give this method a go ... you’re amazing."
- SP, 1-1 online participant
The following are from people who have completed the Helping Children With Loss programme.
Rupert Kaye, Headteacher at Christ Church CofE First School in Frome, Somerset
Back in March 2020, soon after schools were closed in the UK as part of the COVID-19 lockdown, I began looking for a suitable grief recovery course to offer school staff. As a headteacher, I was actively seeking something that would equip us to sensitively and proactively support children’s loss (of normality; certainty; routine; education; contact with friends; contact with family; contact with trusted adults in school; and, ultimately, loss of health and/or death) caused by the pandemic and its aftermath.
I chose the Helping Children Deal with Loss programme because it provided exactly the kind of relevant, cost-effective, online training I was looking for. The course – led by Jill Attree, Advanced Certified Grief Recovery Specialist – ran as weekly two-hour sessions over four weeks via Zoom for eight course participants from our school (one school governor, four teaching assistants, one class teacher and two senior leaders, including myself).
Zoom sessions were a combination of whole-group instruction and discussion, and smaller “break out” discussion groups. Each online session included a welcome five-minute comfort/coffee break part way through. There was homework to do between sessions and this involved reading When Children Grieve, the 250-page set text for the course.
Jill Attree led us with gentleness and answered our questions with clarity. Together, we learned about the six myths of grief and about Short-Term Energy- Relieving Behaviours (STERBS). All eight of us who completed the course are unanimous in our praise for Jill. Thanks to her, this was a fulfilling experience. Each of us has taken away new insights, understanding and skills that will help us to help the children we work with. So, in terms of “bang” for the school “buck” there is no question: Helping Children Deal with Loss represents outstanding value for money. But that is not the end of the story. For each of the course participants, the Helping Children Deal with Loss programme was also a journey of personal discovery, blessing and healing. I, for one, was staggered by just how much loss and grief remained undiscovered and/or unresolved in my own life. For me, learning about three recovery components (Apologies, Forgiveness and Significant Emotional Statements) was a revelation. (I found the section entitled “Forgiveness is an action, not a feeling” especially helpful.) As a Christian headteacher at a Church of England school, I am delighted to be able to share my thoughts and feedback and would unreservedly recommend the Helping Children Deal with Loss course to other schools. Fellow headteachers, I urge you to sign up now! You won’t regret it!
Katy Brunton – Teacher, Old Town First School
Having completed the 1:1 Grief Recovery Programme with Jill I was so excited to hear there was another course to support children. I have been a primary school teacher for 10 years and I have always wanted to know more about supporting children with the losses in their life. I understood there would always be children who would be going through a bereavement or have questions about people dying but felt anxious about knowing what to say and what not to say. I believe this is common amongst many adults who do not want to upset children further but may not have the right skills, based on their own experiences of grief, to support the children positively and effectively.
Through my career I have also experienced and witnessed the many other losses children face day to day in their lives. We are faced with these children everyday going through high levels of trauma not being equipped with the right skills to be the influence and support they need. Thankfully Grief Recovery have created a very well thought out and structured course to help those who support children improve these skills. I was so excited to know we were going to be able to improve our interaction with children around loss.
Our school is in a deprived area and we have high amount of pupil on receipt of pupil premium. We have children who are looked after by social care, foster carers and live with extended family members. We also have high levels of children who have or are still witnessing domestic violence. Many of our children live between homes when parents have split up and many children are dealing with various people coming in and out of their lives. The course that Jill offered us gave us a chance to explore the complexities of grief and understand truly what it is and how it has effected all of us. We were able to share personal experiences which gave us the chance to really understand how grief has effected our own lives and how we have dealt with it.
Jill always created a safe and caring environment where we all felt we were able to share and be heard. Jill was able to guide us on our journey with such kindness and sensitivity that the impact on all of our lives has been huge. We were able to explore specific examples of children within our own school and how we would be able to actually help them acknowledge their grief and begin to complete on their own journeys.
Knowing we now have the tools to actually make a real difference on how children move on with their lives is astounding and I am so pleased we now feel more equipped to have those difficult but necessary conversations with the children and their families. Learning about my own grief has changed my life in more ways I can imagine. Now I know I have the skills to help children so early on in their lives develop positive and effective strategies to deal with the losses in their lives. I would encourage and recommend this course to absolutely anyone who has anything to do with children. It is one the most important lessons we can give our children that will help them in their whole lives. Thank you Jill and thank you Grief Recovery.
Karen Johnstone-McCarthy - Pastoral Care Worker
I recently attended a 4 week Grief Recovery programme and wish to express how much I gained from this training.
The method gives a whole new insight on how to help yourself heal from loss. The focus was on helping children deal with loss, but in order for you to facilitate this, you have to understand that there are specific actions you must take in order to complete one's own losses.
I found the programme to be profound and it has taught me an entirely different way to help support others and, indeed, myself.
Jill was a wonderful facilitator, showing patience, warmth and humour. I came away with a new set of skills, more confidence in my ability to help others and feeling truly enlightened. I can't recommend Jill and the Grief Recovery Method highly enough.
Lindsey Wilson - ELSA, Teach Trust, Poole
I have just completed the Grief Recovery Method - helping children with loss programme with Jill Attree. From the beginning of the course until the end, she made me very welcome with her friendly smile, her professionalism and very caring nature. I have worked with children with emotional difficulties including bereavement for the past 12 years and learnt new & exciting techniques through Jill and the Grief recovery method which I will be putting into practice and helping children I work with move forward through their losses whatever they may be. Jill is so passionate about helping vulnerable children whatever circumstances and I am definitely now ‘a heart with ears’ thank you Jill.
Sam C - Teach Trust, Poole
I have just successfully completed my 'Helping Children deal with Loss' training. I can honestly say that in my years of teaching experience, this has to be one of the most valuable training courses I have ever been on. Not only has it helped me support the children I teach, but as a parent, I feel very much equipped to do the best possible job of bringing up an emotionally confident little girl. It's amazing to think that the way we talk to our children right from an early age, can have a dramatic impact on the way they cope with situations later in life.
Mental health has become so prominent in the last few years and after doing this, I can really see why! I could not recommend this course enough. Thank you Jill Attree for opening my eyes and helping me support the children of our future in a way I never thought I would be able to. My only hope now is that more professionals become aware of Jill’s work and complete the training. I genuinely believe if we were all better equipped to deal with the emotional well being of our children, then issues surrounding mental health would be minimal.
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Have you participated in one of my programmes?
Helping Children with Loss
In addition to Grief Recovery Method programmes for grievers, I also offer courses for adults - parents, teachers and professionals - who would like to be better equipped to help the children in their care cope with losses of any kind.
The ACEs-informed Helping Children with Loss programme uses the same principles of the evidence-based Grief Recovery Method but adapts them for use with children of all ages and ability level.
Bereaved Mum Nicky Clifford recommends The Grief Recovery Method
From devastating bereavement to Grief Recovery - Jill Attree's story
A brief introduction to the Grief Recovery Method
Help for survivors of bereavement by suicide
If you've suffered a loss by suicide or are looking for bereavement counselling for suicide, we're here to offer support.
First Mother’s Day without Mum
Last July, just as I’d pitched up a tent in a field in Cornwall, I got a devastating call from my mum’s friend to say that she’d started coughing up blood not long after we’d left home and had been taken by ambulance to hospital. She didn’t want to worry us. The next day, we learned she had terminal lung cancer that had spread.
Esther Rantzen - Living with Grief
It's not very often tv talks about grief so we're thrilled that Channel 5 have given Esther Rantzen the chance to explore the topic in this ground breaking documentary. A widow herself, Esther wanted to understand other people's reactions to loss and in the in-depth programme she talks to 6 people about their grief experience.
Learning to Let Go of Emotional Baggage
When people say, ‘You have to let go and move on,’ at the end of a relationship, but not many people give you the steps to teach you how to let go of emotional baggage.
Valentine’s When You’re Grieving
When you’ve experienced the death of your husband, wife, or partner, the lead-up to Valentine’s Day may cause you to want to hide undercover until it’s all over.
Eating, Drinking, Keeping Busy: How we're coping with a second lockdown
Have you been hiding or burying your feelings under food or alcohol? Or are shopping and TV your coping mechanism of choice? Here are some things to do instead.
- Learning to Let Go of Emotional Baggage Posted on 26th July 2021 at 16:04
- Help for survivors of bereavement by suicide Posted on 31st March 2021 at 14:53
- First Mother’s Day without Mum Posted on 9th March 2021 at 16:09
- Esther Rantzen - Living with Grief Posted on 17th February 2021 at 11:27
- Valentine’s When You’re Grieving Posted on 12th February 2021 at 16:07
- Eating, Drinking, Keeping Busy: How we're coping with a second lockdown Posted on 25th January 2021 at 12:25
- Stuck on a painful lasting image? Posted on 8th December 2020 at 15:14
- Top 8 Tips for Surviving Grief at Christmas Posted on 2nd December 2020 at 13:25
- Men, Grief and Sudden Loss Posted on 27th November 2020 at 14:06
- Not Able to Say Goodbye? 2020, a Year of Loss Posted on 19th November 2020 at 12:15
Book your place
Grief Recovery Group Programme
Experience the power of Grief Recovery in a group setting. 8 two-hour sessions with a maximum of 12 people. The programme is task based with weekly homework assignments using the Grief Recovery Handbook as the reference book.
For more information on dates/locations, etc. please click the button below.
Grief Recovery 1 to 1 Programme
This step-by-step course shows individuals how to complete the actions necessary to recover from grief in seven 1-hour sessions. Taking place in a safe environment with a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist, it provides a genuine alternative to counselling or therapy. It is a powerful, dynamic, sensible and accessible programme that is genuinely for anyone willing to take the necessary actions to help themselves.
The programme is task based with weekly homework assignments using the Grief Recovery Handbook as the reference book.
Grief Recovery Helping Children with Loss
The Helping Children with Loss programme is for parents, teachers and anyone who works with children in a professional environment. It provides adults with the same tools and techniques used in the evidence based Grief Recovery Method, so they can assist children and young adults of any age or ability level through a loss.
Grief Recovery Pet Loss Programme The loss of a pet can be emotionally devastating. Sadly, the impact of the heartbreak of this type of loss is often downplayed or ignored by friends and family. This 6-meeting program is focused on offering pet owners an effective mechanism for taking action to move through and beyond their grief.
Grief Recovery 1-1 Online
This evidence-based, step-by-step course will help participants complete the actions necessary to recover from grief in seven 1-hour sessions that take place online with an Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist. It is a powerful, dynamic, sensible and accessible programme that is genuinely for anyone willing to take the necessary actions to help themselves.
The programme is task based with weekly homework assignments using the Grief Recovery Handbook as the reference book.
Grief Recovery Helping Children with Loss Online
The Helping Children with Loss programme is an online course for parents, teachers and anyone who works with children in a professional environment. It provides adults with the same tools and techniques used in the evidence based Grief Recovery Method, so they can assist children and young adults of any age or ability level through a loss.